One wonders how to find the JOY this Christmas. How do we let go of our hurt and anger to find the commonality which binds us? Whether it is as huge and unfathomable as Government, Churches and war or as intimate as parenst, brother, sister and misunderstandings, it become increasingly difficult to see the good. The peacemaker in me wishes to reach out and find the bridge between each of us, yet the man who feels betrayed wants only to make his injuries known.
So, I fall flat on my face somewhere in between. Each time I extend understanding and find rejection my human nature wants only to recoil and strike out and cause injury again in return. It's ignoble and frustrating to this way fail again and again. And as impartial as I'd like to become, to cast aside any thought of concern for what others think of or feel for me, it's just not to be done. So, I mostly face each day with a sense of failing myself and others - as though the burden of peacemaker indeed rests solely with me.
I don't have the answers. I struggle with forgiving those who have harmed me and I imagine they struggle to forgive me for the harm I've caused. Perhaps understanding in this life is more than can be expected. So, I'll look to the next. And the JOY? Well, if I remember to look it's there. In a husband who stands by me and loves me despite years of struggle. A daughter who sees in me a parent I never expected to be. In the affection of furry little cat-people who think the sun rises and sets by me.
This then is JOY - for in each I see Jesus, born yet again in each of us. I may never enjoy the consolation of all my family being together in a loving way, or the world at peace, but I have this little family right now. I am grateful and full of peace for this at least. So, repeat the sound of JOY. Again and again!
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