The New York Times, this morning, is reporting a statement from the Vatican that chastises Israel. In the statement Benedict XVI says, and I paraphrase, that Israel could not be included in his statement condemning the recent terrorist acts in other countries, like Britain, because, Israel often transgresses and crosses International laws by retaliating inappropriately to the Palestinians suicide bombers.
I am shocked. The changes already under this man's leadership are quite terrifying. He has, along with JPII, strayed far from the teachings of Vatican Council II. It is no longer correct, apparently, to seek to have open discussion between theologians and the hierarchy regarding differences of opinion. This is devastating to many Catholics who see problems with issues such as artificial contraception being condemned when it stops unwanted pregnancies and disease. Condoms are known to inhibit many sexually transmitted diseases and with the prospect of AIDS being substantially halted in its insidious progress in places like Africa many feel, as I do, that it is a death sentence to deny their rightful place in saving lives. Now this latest volley against Ecumenism, a charge close and dear to John XXIII and Pius XI, will bring a crashing end to the outreach between Faiths that I was taught to value. Additionally, and the issue closest to my heart, the terrible and erroneous statements regarding gays and lesbians as being "intrinsically evil" and "morally disordered" is a sickening blow of hatred towards the many, many good men and women I know who happen to have been born homosexual. it is impossible to have been made in the image and likeness of God and be 'intrinsically evil' to the point of permanent separation from God. This Pope also attacks the notion that the many men of goodwill who do not know of Jesus may be saved. this is directly opposed to the catechism of my school days when all men of good will were presumed baptized by desire, if not by the hands of a priest.
If we are to return to a purely legalistic and orthodox approach to our sacraments, disregarding the spirit, we are surely doomed to repeat many atrocities in God's name. A hard hand and a Latin Mass are not the answer to falling numbers at the altar rail, but rather a remembrance of Jesus' word about it all: "and the greatest of these is Love." It is a clear path and easily known, if not followed. Love. It is within our grasp for the knowledge of our hearts is known to us. If you cannot discern Love in this pope's actions then I suggest his actions are not of God but of man. We seem too ready to invest the Vicar of Christ with the divinity of God and forget his humanity, which is capable of every flaw.
If you think this is easy for me to believe, much less say openly, you are wrong. I was raised to hold the hierarchy of the Church in reverence and respect. Yet, I am also included in the literal definition of the Church: the People of God. I, too have an obligation and a duty to foster that which I have been taught is the Truth for my nearly fifty years. That teaching is being radically revised.
I suggest remembering in ones prayers the lives lost each day everywhere, with no distinction made to whom is right and whom is wrong in the conflict. All acts of terrorism are wrong, even those perpetrated against our enemies. Cardinal Bernardin, a loving follower of John XXII, reminds us that if we purport to care for human life from its conception as being a viable indefensible human being whom we are charged to protect than we surely have the obligation to extend that protection and respect throughout the life of each soul inhabiting this planet in all of its stages. We cannot overlook, then, the agonies of our gay brothers and sisters, nor the suffering of our Jewish and Palestinian brothers and sisters. We are duty bound to hold each soul as the repository of our Lord. As men far greater than I have said, I believe this Truth to be self evident.
Friday, July 29, 2005
Ah! Realize Your Youth While You Have It!
These widgets are a marvy thing. I've had a load of fun with them today, though very few actually do anything I require or desire, if truth is told. I do like the i-Tunes device which searches for the album covers to display. Many of my recordings in i-Tunes are from my CD collection and not purchased from the on-line store. This device allows me to recover these previously unavailable artworks for my viewing pleasure. C'est bon!
Oscar Wilde was a devotee of Antinous in his time, as well as Hyacinthe, and his poem the 'Sphynx' speaks of the boy made God. However, the 'spirit' of Antinous is better served in his 'The Story of Dorian Gray', the novel of the trajedy of seeking only the superficial in life. His moment of truth arrives as he views the portrait and realizes he shall indeed, one day, grow old. All this after Lord Henry pushes home the point with this little speech:
""Some day, when you are old and wrinkled and ugly, when thought has seared your forehead with its lines, and passion branded your lips with its hideous fires, you will feel it, you will feel it terribly. Now, wherever you go, you charm the world. Will it always be so? . . . You have a wonderfully beautiful face, Mr. Gray. Don't frown. You have. And beauty is a form of genius-- is higher, indeed, than genius, as it needs no explanation. It is of the great facts of the world, like sunlight, or spring-time, or the reflection in dark waters of that silver shell we call the moon. It cannot be questioned. It has its divine right of sovereignty. It makes princes of those who have it. You smile? Ah! when you have lost it you won't smile. . . . People say sometimes that beauty is only superficial. That may be so, but at least it is not so superficial as thought is. To me, beauty is the wonder of wonders. It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible. . . . Yes, Mr. Gray, the gods have been good to you. But what the gods give they quickly take away. You have only a few years in which to live really, perfectly, and fully. When your youth goes, your beauty will go with it, and then you will suddenly discover that there are no triumphs left for you, or have to content yourself with those mean triumphs that the memory of your past will make more bitter than defeats. Every month as it wanes brings you nearer to something dreadful. Time is jealous of you, and wars against your lilies and your roses. You will become sallow, and hollow-cheeked, and dull- eyed. You will suffer horribly.... Ah! realize your youth while you have it.""
I have lived with my dearest one and the quest for youth in medicine and diet and exercise are well known to us both, but none shall save us in the end. They merely extend the last flickering benfeits of the white hot coals before they expire and we are no more of this world.
Oscar Wilde was a devotee of Antinous in his time, as well as Hyacinthe, and his poem the 'Sphynx' speaks of the boy made God. However, the 'spirit' of Antinous is better served in his 'The Story of Dorian Gray', the novel of the trajedy of seeking only the superficial in life. His moment of truth arrives as he views the portrait and realizes he shall indeed, one day, grow old. All this after Lord Henry pushes home the point with this little speech:
""Some day, when you are old and wrinkled and ugly, when thought has seared your forehead with its lines, and passion branded your lips with its hideous fires, you will feel it, you will feel it terribly. Now, wherever you go, you charm the world. Will it always be so? . . . You have a wonderfully beautiful face, Mr. Gray. Don't frown. You have. And beauty is a form of genius-- is higher, indeed, than genius, as it needs no explanation. It is of the great facts of the world, like sunlight, or spring-time, or the reflection in dark waters of that silver shell we call the moon. It cannot be questioned. It has its divine right of sovereignty. It makes princes of those who have it. You smile? Ah! when you have lost it you won't smile. . . . People say sometimes that beauty is only superficial. That may be so, but at least it is not so superficial as thought is. To me, beauty is the wonder of wonders. It is only shallow people who do not judge by appearances. The true mystery of the world is the visible, not the invisible. . . . Yes, Mr. Gray, the gods have been good to you. But what the gods give they quickly take away. You have only a few years in which to live really, perfectly, and fully. When your youth goes, your beauty will go with it, and then you will suddenly discover that there are no triumphs left for you, or have to content yourself with those mean triumphs that the memory of your past will make more bitter than defeats. Every month as it wanes brings you nearer to something dreadful. Time is jealous of you, and wars against your lilies and your roses. You will become sallow, and hollow-cheeked, and dull- eyed. You will suffer horribly.... Ah! realize your youth while you have it.""
I have lived with my dearest one and the quest for youth in medicine and diet and exercise are well known to us both, but none shall save us in the end. They merely extend the last flickering benfeits of the white hot coals before they expire and we are no more of this world.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Uuhgg!
I MUST EDIT! I MUST EDIT! I MUST EDIT!
I shall continue to humiliate myself to no end with this rampant lot of mis-spellings and non-capatialized words and miriad of other annoying syntac and grammar issues.... forgive me reader!
I shall continue to humiliate myself to no end with this rampant lot of mis-spellings and non-capatialized words and miriad of other annoying syntac and grammar issues.... forgive me reader!
O comment je t'aime!
Antinous, Antinous - I keep thinking of all the new information which has been presented to me on some very formidable websites. The most involved is the one dedicated to Antinous as a deity one may still worship. It's very beautiful and romantic, and though it is not right for me, I can see the attraction. The worship of male beauty, youth, manliness and prowess of the the athlete and the hunter, the hand-boy of an Emperor. Yum! Check it out at http://www.antinopolis.org/, be properly respectful as this is a faith to these men... The Temple of Antinous. Beautiful. Another site give a clear and consice history of Hadrian and Antinous and their relationship and how Antinous, a humble village lad, becomes the last God of the Roman Pantheon...
Mark has downloaded the new Mac software 'Tiger' into my T. powerbook and I'm quite delighted with the new options and the new speed. Quickness! Lightfooted flying of HERMES seems to have inauguarated my tiring machine to a new existence. A super-deified computer, if you will...
Still the problems with the formatting for this site continue - I hope over the weekend to resolve some of these things and really be up and running. I need to focus more on the content as well. There should be a complimenatry theme with Antinous, I'm thinking religion and sex together. How they DO work together, instead of this hypocritical nonsense about ones sexuality, gay straight, bi or trans -it's an expression of the deepest workings of a person and one cannot attack it as though it is the choice of a lifestyle. As if you were decorating a house! Oh! Shall I have blue or lavendar silk in theis room as if you can translate that to Oh, can I fuck womwn and men or just one or the other, and when the silk and the present attraction are old hat one just tosses it aside and becomes sexually something else... preposturous!
I have been Queer from the moment I was born. At six I had a doll, very dear to me. In my teens I had great times with my sister and her barbies, and inventing stories. later we 'built' a restaurant, swagging bedspreads for drapes and table cloths to create an intimate Paris bistro. I love it all still today, I'm just considered good at design and it's not any longer a critiscm of my sexual being. Besides, screw them all if they can't take a china queen in allher glory. There problem these days!
So, if we meet and visit somdat you'll get atour of the old French armoire which holds my Bernardauad, my Sevres, my Wedgwood, my Met artist designed pieces, my Herend, etc. etc.
Billy, our roomate 1, has returned from ten days in Calgary for the MCC conference. he says it was marvelous, wonderful, and I'm very happy that he has had a respite from LA and a spiritual experience at services which moved him. These are the good things of life. I'm happy for the boy... man!
I have promises from my other roomy, Little Mike, in deference to our trainer who is "big Mike', of his modelling for me for some 'artitic' shots for my paintings. Very happy about this , um, comming up - he is striking and beautifull proportioned. he will be a truly inspirational subject to work with.
I've been presented with the following requests from my dear spouse, suggesting a VERY pleasent evening. Since it's a tad risque I will leave the translation to you...
"Je voudrais au va te faire foutre jusqu'à ce que votre âne ait été sanglant et vous m'avez prié de prendre mon robinet hors de votre âne. Je vous veux sur votre ventre avec votre âne magnifique rond offert jusqu'à moi. Ce qui précède est juste un début... parce que je veux faire l'amour avec vous pour des heures et des heures... jusqu'à ce que nous passions dehors dans les bras de chacun et le sillage là avec le nothingmore sur nos esprits que le faisant.
Oh comment je souhaite que je pourrais parler français ainsi moi pourrait chuchoter les phrases ci-dessus dans vos oreilles. comme j'ai mâché sur lui et nuzzled les... < grimace >
Oh comment je t'aime...
M"
So much for the world's turn today.... and damn swell after a seventeen year marriage! La passion n'est pas mort! A tout les glories de Dieu de mon coeur! Baisons>>> Adieu
Mark has downloaded the new Mac software 'Tiger' into my T. powerbook and I'm quite delighted with the new options and the new speed. Quickness! Lightfooted flying of HERMES seems to have inauguarated my tiring machine to a new existence. A super-deified computer, if you will...
Still the problems with the formatting for this site continue - I hope over the weekend to resolve some of these things and really be up and running. I need to focus more on the content as well. There should be a complimenatry theme with Antinous, I'm thinking religion and sex together. How they DO work together, instead of this hypocritical nonsense about ones sexuality, gay straight, bi or trans -it's an expression of the deepest workings of a person and one cannot attack it as though it is the choice of a lifestyle. As if you were decorating a house! Oh! Shall I have blue or lavendar silk in theis room as if you can translate that to Oh, can I fuck womwn and men or just one or the other, and when the silk and the present attraction are old hat one just tosses it aside and becomes sexually something else... preposturous!
I have been Queer from the moment I was born. At six I had a doll, very dear to me. In my teens I had great times with my sister and her barbies, and inventing stories. later we 'built' a restaurant, swagging bedspreads for drapes and table cloths to create an intimate Paris bistro. I love it all still today, I'm just considered good at design and it's not any longer a critiscm of my sexual being. Besides, screw them all if they can't take a china queen in allher glory. There problem these days!
So, if we meet and visit somdat you'll get atour of the old French armoire which holds my Bernardauad, my Sevres, my Wedgwood, my Met artist designed pieces, my Herend, etc. etc.
Billy, our roomate 1, has returned from ten days in Calgary for the MCC conference. he says it was marvelous, wonderful, and I'm very happy that he has had a respite from LA and a spiritual experience at services which moved him. These are the good things of life. I'm happy for the boy... man!
I have promises from my other roomy, Little Mike, in deference to our trainer who is "big Mike', of his modelling for me for some 'artitic' shots for my paintings. Very happy about this , um, comming up - he is striking and beautifull proportioned. he will be a truly inspirational subject to work with.
I've been presented with the following requests from my dear spouse, suggesting a VERY pleasent evening. Since it's a tad risque I will leave the translation to you...
"Je voudrais au va te faire foutre jusqu'à ce que votre âne ait été sanglant et vous m'avez prié de prendre mon robinet hors de votre âne. Je vous veux sur votre ventre avec votre âne magnifique rond offert jusqu'à moi. Ce qui précède est juste un début... parce que je veux faire l'amour avec vous pour des heures et des heures... jusqu'à ce que nous passions dehors dans les bras de chacun et le sillage là avec le nothingmore sur nos esprits que le faisant.
Oh comment je souhaite que je pourrais parler français ainsi moi pourrait chuchoter les phrases ci-dessus dans vos oreilles. comme j'ai mâché sur lui et nuzzled les... < grimace >
Oh comment je t'aime...
M"
So much for the world's turn today.... and damn swell after a seventeen year marriage! La passion n'est pas mort! A tout les glories de Dieu de mon coeur! Baisons>>> Adieu
Monday, July 25, 2005
25 Julliet 2005 1:00AM
I tried to rest, I petted the cat, in fact gave him a good brushing, but I am not able to dose off. So, as they say to do, I have arisen and am occupying myself instead of dwelling on the sleeplessness.
One of the reasons to write this online journal is to save the cost of a therapist! I've read in several other peoples' logs that it is very effective in providing a certain clarity and a perspective in evaluating their issues. I've decided it is worth a try. The trick, of course, is to make it a journey of Everyman so that it will be worth reading to someone besides myself. Humor, I've found is also key - that will be tricky for me! I have about as much natural humor as I have desire to sleep ( yes this is a euphemism) with a woman. I have nothing against women, I'm simply not attracted to them physically. Now, to their minds it's very different. I'm absolutely often enamored. My dear friend, Lisa, has a brilliant analytical thought process of which I'm in awe, and my darling Julia is capable of concise and pointed thinking which she maintains in her conversation making all our talks together most enjoyable. The only women I dislike cannot be grouped as their sex being the reason for the dislike - for I've certainly seen the behavior in gay men, and even straight dudes. The people who tend to irk me are those who are overly dependent, in a bad way and are needy to the point of leaving nothing left in me to leach out. They simply sap one of everything bit of energy: spiritual, emotional and even many times ones reason. When I wish to begin screaming at them to get the f*** out and never f****ing come back you know it's time to gracefully bow out before you allow yourself such a self indulgent and surely, very soon, regrettable act of surly unkindness.
RUN!
Doesn't Scripture say something about disengaging from those who vex your spirit. Well, those above are they.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I'm puffing on my Gitanes as I'm writing and the smoke has a lovely way of curling and writhing about in the dim light. This tobacco is heavy and rich and very flavorful to taste, a sweet, dewy-earth sort of taste, which takes me back somehow to France, Provence in-particular and a little village called Le Baroux. It was a fortified hill town, now just a hill town with a castle. The Templars were residents at one time, though it is being gentrified these days into chic little getaways for Parisians and Ex-pats. At any rate a nearby Monastery had the most charming lavender garden, grown almost as a maze, and the heavy wet foggy air laid upon it, veiling it until the morning sun caused it's dissipation. It was the way the earth smelt at that moment, as the mist rose, that my smokes are able to remind me.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
More Regarding Antinous:
"And such a one is the new God Antinous, that was the Emperor Hadrian's minion and the slave of his unlawful pleasure; a wreth, whom that that worshipped in obedience to the Emperor's command, and for fear of his vengeance, knew and confessed to be a man, and not a good or deserving man neither, but a sordid and loathsome instrument of his master's lust. This shameless and scandalous boy died in Egypt when the court was there; and forthwith his Imperial Majesty issued out an order or edict strictly requiring and commanding his loving subjects to acknowledge his departed page a deity and to pay him his quota of divine reverences and honours as such: a resolution and act which did more effectually publish and testify to the world how entirely the Emperor's unnatural passion survived the foul object of it; and how much his master was devoted to memory, than it recorded his own crime and condemnation, immortalized his infamy and shame, and bequeathed to mankind a lasting and notorious specimen of the true origin and extraction of all idolatry"
Saint Anthanasius, 350 AD
One of the reasons to write this online journal is to save the cost of a therapist! I've read in several other peoples' logs that it is very effective in providing a certain clarity and a perspective in evaluating their issues. I've decided it is worth a try. The trick, of course, is to make it a journey of Everyman so that it will be worth reading to someone besides myself. Humor, I've found is also key - that will be tricky for me! I have about as much natural humor as I have desire to sleep ( yes this is a euphemism) with a woman. I have nothing against women, I'm simply not attracted to them physically. Now, to their minds it's very different. I'm absolutely often enamored. My dear friend, Lisa, has a brilliant analytical thought process of which I'm in awe, and my darling Julia is capable of concise and pointed thinking which she maintains in her conversation making all our talks together most enjoyable. The only women I dislike cannot be grouped as their sex being the reason for the dislike - for I've certainly seen the behavior in gay men, and even straight dudes. The people who tend to irk me are those who are overly dependent, in a bad way and are needy to the point of leaving nothing left in me to leach out. They simply sap one of everything bit of energy: spiritual, emotional and even many times ones reason. When I wish to begin screaming at them to get the f*** out and never f****ing come back you know it's time to gracefully bow out before you allow yourself such a self indulgent and surely, very soon, regrettable act of surly unkindness.
RUN!
Doesn't Scripture say something about disengaging from those who vex your spirit. Well, those above are they.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I'm puffing on my Gitanes as I'm writing and the smoke has a lovely way of curling and writhing about in the dim light. This tobacco is heavy and rich and very flavorful to taste, a sweet, dewy-earth sort of taste, which takes me back somehow to France, Provence in-particular and a little village called Le Baroux. It was a fortified hill town, now just a hill town with a castle. The Templars were residents at one time, though it is being gentrified these days into chic little getaways for Parisians and Ex-pats. At any rate a nearby Monastery had the most charming lavender garden, grown almost as a maze, and the heavy wet foggy air laid upon it, veiling it until the morning sun caused it's dissipation. It was the way the earth smelt at that moment, as the mist rose, that my smokes are able to remind me.
__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
More Regarding Antinous:
"And such a one is the new God Antinous, that was the Emperor Hadrian's minion and the slave of his unlawful pleasure; a wreth, whom that that worshipped in obedience to the Emperor's command, and for fear of his vengeance, knew and confessed to be a man, and not a good or deserving man neither, but a sordid and loathsome instrument of his master's lust. This shameless and scandalous boy died in Egypt when the court was there; and forthwith his Imperial Majesty issued out an order or edict strictly requiring and commanding his loving subjects to acknowledge his departed page a deity and to pay him his quota of divine reverences and honours as such: a resolution and act which did more effectually publish and testify to the world how entirely the Emperor's unnatural passion survived the foul object of it; and how much his master was devoted to memory, than it recorded his own crime and condemnation, immortalized his infamy and shame, and bequeathed to mankind a lasting and notorious specimen of the true origin and extraction of all idolatry"
Saint Anthanasius, 350 AD
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
